Tuesday, January 04, 2005

Free pop3/smtp Access to yahoo mail

Hey guys,,,
i came across one of the application that provides free pop3/smtp
access to yahoo mail...it also supports linux and mac os...You can
visit it at following link and download the application ..its free....
Click here

Monday, January 03, 2005

Why they get paid so much at help desk..

Helpdesk: What kind of computer do you have?
Customer: A white one...
Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.
Helpdesk: Have you tried pushing the button ?
Customer: Yes, but it's really stuck.
Helpdesk: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note ...
Customer: No ... wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still
on my desk... sorry .
Helpdesk: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left ?
Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you ?
Male customer: Hello... I can't print.
Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and ...
Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me ! I'm not Bill
Gates damn it !
Hi good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try it
says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in
front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...
Customer: I have problems printing in red...
Helpdesk: Do you have a colour printer ?
Customer: No.
Helpdesk: What's on your monitor now ma'am ?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.
Helpdesk: And now hit F8.
Customer: It's not working.
Helpdesk: What did you do, exactly ?
Customer: I hit the F-key 8-times as you told me, but nothing's
Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Helpdesk: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer ?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Helpdesk: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer: OK
Helpdesk: Did the keyboard come with you ?
Customer: Yes
Helpdesk: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another
keyboard ?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work !
Helpdesk: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital
letter V as in Victor, the number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?
A customer couldn't get on the internet.
Helpdesk: Are you sure you used the right password ?
Customer: Yes I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Helpdesk: Can you tell me what the password was ?
Customer: Five stars.
Helpdesk: What antivirus program do you use ?
Customer: Netscape.
Helpdesk: That's not an antivirus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.
Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screensaver on my
computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears !
Helpdesk: Microsoft Tech. Support, may I help you ?
Customer: Good afternoon! I have waited over 4 hours for you. Can you
please tell me how long it will take before you can help me ?
Helpdesk: Uhh..? Pardon, I don't understand your problem ?
Customer: I was working in Word and clicked the help button more than 4
hours ago. Can you tell me when you will finally be helping me ?
Helpdesk: How may I help you ?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
Helpdesk: OK, and, what seems to be the problem ?
Customer: Well, I have the letter a, but how do I get the circle around
it ?

Making of a Programmer ..

Billy's Mom's Letters
The following appeared in a computer magazine in Mr. Dvorak's column:
Dear Mr. Dvorak:
Ann Landers wouldn't print this. I have nowhere else to turn. I have to get
the word out. Warn other parents. I must be rambling on. Let me try and
explain. It's about my son, Billy. He's always been a good, normal ten year
old boy. Well, last spring we sat down after dinner to select a summer camp
for Billy. We sorted through the camp brochures. There were the usual camps
with swimming, canoeing, games, singing by the campfire -- you know. There
were sports camps and specialty camps for weight reduction, music, military
camps and camps that specialized in Tibetan knot tying. I tried to talk him
into Camp Winnepoopoo. It's where he went last year. (He made an adorable
picture out of painted pinto beans and macaroni). Billy would have none of
it. Billy pulled a brochure out of his pocket. It was for a COMPUTER CAMP!
We should have put our foot down right there, if only we had known. He left
three weeks ago. I don't know what's happened. He's changed. I can't explain
it. See for yourself. These are some of my little Billy's letters.
Dear Mom,
The kids are dorky nerds. The food stinks. The computers are the only good
part. We're learning how to program. Late at night is the best time to
program, so they let us stay up.
Love, Billy.
Dear Mom,
Camp is O.K. Last night we had pizza in the middle of the night. We all get
to choose what we want to drink. I drink Classic Coke. By the way, can you
make Szechuan food? I'm getting used to it now. Gotta go, it's time for the
flowchart class.
Love, Billy.
P.S. This is written on a wordprocessor. Pretty swell, huh? It's
spellchecked too.
Dear Mom,
Don't worry. We do regular camp stuff. We told ghost stories by the glow of
the green computer screens. It was real neat. I don't have much of a tan
'cause we don't go outside very often. You can't see the computer screen in
the sunlight anyway. That wimp camp I went to last year fed us weird food
too. Lay off, Mom. I'm okay, really.
Love, Billy.
Dear Mom,
I'm fine. I'm sleeping enough. I'm eating enough. This is the best camp
ever. We scared the counselor with some phony worm code. It was real funny.
He got mad and yelled. Frederick says it's okay. Can you send more money? I
spent mine on a pocket protector and a box of blank diskettes. I've got to
chip in on the phone bill. Did you know that you can talk to people on a
computer? Give my regards to Dad.
Love, Billy.
Dear Mother,
Forget the money for the telephone. We've got a way to not pay. Sorry I
haven't written. I've been learning a lot. I'm real good at getting onto any
computer in the country. It's really easy! I got into the university's in
less than fifteen minutes. Frederick did it in five, he's going to show me
how. Frederick is my bunk partner. He's really smart. He says that I
shouldn't call myself Billy anymore. So, I'm not.
Signed, William.
Dear Mother,
How nice of you to come up on Parents Day. Why'd you get so upset? I haven't
gained that much weight. The glasses aren't real. Everybody wears them. I
was trying to fit in. Believe me, the tape on them is cool. I thought that
you'd be proud of my program. After all, I've made some money on it. A
publisher is sending a check for $30,000. Anyway, I've paid for the next six
weeks of camp. I won't be home until late August.
Regards, William.
Stop treating me like a child. True -- physically I am only ten years old.
It was silly of you to try to kidnap me. Do not try again. Remember, I can
make your life miserable (i.e. - the bank, credit bureau, and government
computers). I am not kidding. O.K.? I won't write again and this is your
only warning. The emotions of this interpersonal communication drain me.
Sincerely, William.
See what I mean? It's been two weeks since I've heard from my little boy.
What can I do, Mr.Dvorak? I know that it's probably too late to save my
little Billy. But, if by printing these letters you can save JUST ONE CHILD
from a life of programming, please, I beg of you to do so. Thank you very
Sally Gates,
Concerned Parent

Healthy place!!

Mr. Peterson, a tourist from Toronto arrived in Florida.

In an airport taxi cab, Peterson asked the driver... "Say, is this really a
healthful place?"

"It sure is," the cabby replied. "When I came here I couldn't say one word. I
had hardly any hair on my head. I didn't have the strength to walk across a
room, and I had to be lifted out of bed."

"Wow. That's wonderful!" said the tourist , "How long have you been here?"

"I was born here."

iitb.humour.. rocks :-)

Saturday, January 01, 2005

test mail

just checking whether it works or not from email

Saurabh Joshi
IIT Bombay